Research has shown that regular physical intimacy plays an important role in most couplesâ sense of relationship quality. In general, couples who share regular and satisfying patterns of physical intimacy in their relationship report greater satisfaction, commitment, and emotional closeness than individuals who struggle with this part of their relationship. Take this short assessment to see if you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to intimacy in your relationship.
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In an average month, how often do you desire sexual intimacy with your partner?
In an average month, how often do you desire affectionate touching with your partner (such as cuddling, hugging, kissing, etc.)?
In an average month, how often does your partner desire sexual intimacy with you?
In an average month, how often does your partner desire affectionate touching with your partner (such as cuddling, hugging, kissing, etc.)?
In an average month, how often do you have sexual intimacy as a couple?
In an average month, how often do you engage in affectionate touching as a couple (such as cuddling, hugging, kissing, etc.) as a couple?
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Please repeat the quiz and try different answer combinations.On the same page
Your results suggest that you and your partner are reporting similar levels of desire for sexual intimacy and affection. Congratulations! You are avoiding one of, if not the, most common complaints in relationships when it comes to intimacy. Research shows that couples with similar desires scores tend to be the most satisfied and happy with their relationship. Sexual intimacy and affectionate touch have been found to positively influence many parts of a coupleâs relationship. For example, couples who report more intimate touch report that they have more effective communication, less conflict, easier conflict resolution and emotional closeness. Physical intimacy reinforces the closeness of the relationship and provides a tangible reminder of the partnerâs love.
Since youâre on the same page with higher desires for sexual intimacy, your main focus should be on making sure that commitments outside your relationship donât get in the way of making sure you have time to be together.
Since youâre on the same page with higher desires for sexual intimacy, your main focus should be on making sure that commitments outside your relationship donât get in the way of making sure you have time to be together.
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Out of sync
Partners having a mismatched sexual desire is a common complaint in relationships when it comes to intimacy. But this discrepancy between partners has been linked in research to several negative outcomes, especially if these mismatched desires exist for a long period of time and create lingering dissatisfaction for one or both partners. Often the partner with the lower desire is viewed as the âgatekeeperâ of the relationship. Sexual intimacy and affectionate touch have been found to positively influence many parts of a coupleâs relationship. For example, couples who report more intimate touch report that they have more effective communication, less conflict, easier conflict resolution and emotional closeness. Physical intimacy reinforces the closeness of the relationship and provides a tangible reminder of the partnerâs love.
The first step to improving this area of your relationship is to understand where the discrepancy comes from. This may be due to a physical condition; in which case a medical professional may be able to help. Or it may be more emotional in nature. Perhaps your partner does not fully understand your needs when it comes to physical intimacy in the relationship or vice-versa. Tell them! Try to do so in a way that doesnât come across as blaming or nagging. Simply be honest with each other about how you feel and what your needs are to increase the desire for sexual intimacy in your relationship! This conversation shouldnât focus on increasing the frequency of intimacy to match each others desire, but rather to help your partner understand your perspective and open a dialogue focused on compromise and responsiveness.
The first step to improving this area of your relationship is to understand where the discrepancy comes from. This may be due to a physical condition; in which case a medical professional may be able to help. Or it may be more emotional in nature. Perhaps your partner does not fully understand your needs when it comes to physical intimacy in the relationship or vice-versa. Tell them! Try to do so in a way that doesnât come across as blaming or nagging. Simply be honest with each other about how you feel and what your needs are to increase the desire for sexual intimacy in your relationship! This conversation shouldnât focus on increasing the frequency of intimacy to match each others desire, but rather to help your partner understand your perspective and open a dialogue focused on compromise and responsiveness.
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