More and more Americans are "stealth shopping," where they are hiding their big purchases from the partners. America is a country that has a heavy emphasis on consumerism, where many couple's have disagreements over what to buy or how much they spend. According to a survey conducted by Circuit last October, over the span of a year, nearly two-thirds of people who live with a spouse or significant other hid a purchase from their partner. A quarter of them hid a clothing purchase and one-in-10 manipulated financial records to conceal their spending. “That’s what the gym bag or dry-cleaning bag is for,” Stacy Geisinger told The Wall Street Journal. “It delays the fight—because you can have two fights,” Geisinger continued. “One when you bring the shopping bag into the house and one when the bill comes.”

According to Cali Estes, a clinical psychologist based in Miami who specializes in treating addictive behaviors, she has seen an influx in stealth shopping in recent years, seemingly fueled by influencers. “When you see someone online pushing something, you feel more pressure to buy it—even if you can’t afford it,” Estes said. She shared that one of her patients cut the tags off her new clothes and washed them before wearing it to make them seem old. Another patient hid her new Christian Louboutin shoes in her son's toy box and was outed when he pranced around the house in the stilettos.

With inflation continuing to rise, stealth shopping is exacerbating the problem for couples on a tight budget. Estes advises couples to set aside an amount in their monthly spending budget that doesn't require permission from their partner. “This way, you can buy what you want, as long as you stay within the preset limit,” she said. When a person lies to their partner about their spending habits, it leads the partner to have mistrust throughout the relationship. “Your partner will say, ‘If you lie about buying shoes, what else are you lying about?’” Estes said.