You love your spouse. If you didn't, you probably wouldn't be married to them. While you can love your spouse with your whole heart, there may be times when you're not satisfied with your marriage as a whole.
Maybe you don't go on as many dates as you would like. Maybe the romance has dissipated and you're stuck dreaming of how things used to be. Maybe your marriage has become boring and you're ready for a new adventure.
These feelings can be easily mistaken for falling out of love with your spouse, when you're actually falling out of love with your marriage. Here are 11 ways you can turn it around and have the best marriage ever:
1. Keep the element of surprise
After the excitement of new marriage dies down and kids come, it's easy to get stuck in the day-to-day tasks of life. This can leave your romance feeling a little dry, so put a little surprise into your relationship.
Leave notes around the house, plan surprise dates or rent your spouse's favorite movie and eat a pizza in bed. It doesn't have to be big to make a world of difference.
2. Carefully schedule date nights
Date nights are crucial to falling and staying in love with your marriage. Again, it doesn't have to be a big, fancy expensive date, but schedule time at least once per week to do something fun with just your spouse.
3. Plan your future
Planning the future helps you put into perspective that you're with your sweetheart forever and you have a lot to look forward to. Whether you're planning a romantic vacation or retirement later on, having something to look forward to with your honey gives your marriage extra excitement.
4. Hold hands
I recently heard from an elderly couple that the secret to staying together and in love is to touch every time you pass each other. It doesn't have to be a big hug every time, but a small touch on the shoulder shows love and care.
Hold hands wherever you go. Give that physical affection that you sometimes forget about when life happens. This will help give your marriage a sense of safety and love that can only be felt when you're crazy for your relationship.
5. Pretend you're still dating
This is my favorite thing to do when my marriage feels repetitive and mundane. Make an extra special effort to impress your spouse, say kind things instead of criticism and treat your spouse like you did when you started to fall for them.
6. Do something you've never done
Try something you've never done with your spouse. If you've been wanting to go on that hike you found out about, go! If there's a restaurant you want to try, now's the perfect time. Getting out of your comfort zone and breaking habits will liven up your marriage.
7. Set goals
Having goals will help you and your spouse work toward something as a team. When you're working for something and have the same desired outcome, you'll grow closer and your marriage will benefit.
8. Put your spouse first
Your spouse should come before everything. There are a lot of things that need your attention, including your kids and job, but your spouse needs it more.
9. Put your phones AWAY
I heard a story about a man who was on an airplane, and a young couple was sitting in front of him. The wife was trying to snuggle up to her husband, give him a kiss and talk with him the whole flight, but his eyes never moved from the game he was preoccupied with on his device.
Look up from your phones. When you get those rare moments of time alone together, it might be your instinct to check your social media sites. Save that for later and be in the moment with your sweetheart.
10. Share your day
Take turns telling each other all about your day. Getting a glimpse into the life of your sweetheart will give you a new appreciation for everything they do, and make your marriage awesome.
11. Consciously try to make each other happy
You know better than anyone what makes your spouse happy. Whatever it might be, always make an effort to keep them smiling.
By doing these eleven things, you can fall in love with your marriage and become the definition of #relationshipgoals.
