Breaking up with class and tact can be hard to do. You hope your latest ex will take the high road but you can never be too sure (You also know you can have a mean streak when emotions are running high) ... So how can you help keep your prickly post-romance personality in check after the end?
Here are five ways to avoid a tasteless break up no matter how he handles himself.
1. Make an exit plan
Decide how you would like to leave your next relationship before it's over. Imagine yourself at your best and most gracious and write it down. Keep it somewhere accessible and return to it when it's time to move on. Use it to remind yourself how great you can be when life gets difficult. Follow your own advice before your slighted mind has time to contrive something devious and regrettable.
2. Talk it out
Talk it through before you act it out. Speak with friends and trusted family about how you feel and how you'd like to end the relationship. Take a breath. Don't call, text or post in haste. Before and afterwards, keep your emotions and words under control until you can reach someone who has a clearer head. Listen to them and what they think about what you should and shouldn't do.
3. Trade war stories
Ask your friends and family about their worst breakup experiences. Hearing how bad the people you care about (and the people they cared about) can be to each other during a breakup can help you put things into perspective. You might even gain some insight on how gory details about slander, embarrassment and secrets can alter your opinion of someone you love. Knowing how bad things can get will teach you that while good friends will stick by your side no matter what, improper breakup behavior will taint their image of you.
4. Plan to post it
If you're tempted to drag your relationship through the mud online, stop. Put yourself in your follower's shoes. If you'd be too embarrassed to post it and read about it as a follower, don't do it. If you'd be proud to post it and read about it, go ahead. Before you tweet, hashtag or post anything, think a little further into the future. If you wouldn't want your future fiancé to read about your bad behavior during a breakup years later, don't do it.
5. The golden rule
What you're taught as a child often applies as an adult."Do onto others as you would have them do onto you." "Treat others how you want to be treated" also applies into adulthood. If you wouldn't want to deal with the aftermath you would cause someone else after a breakup, keep your integrity and take the high road.
Keeping breakups civil becomes harder as more and more people live their lives online. Gossip, revenge, fighting your battles via Twitter, and trolling are becoming common place in situations that should remain private. Too often, respect and appreciation you had for each other dissolves into hatred and a desire to "win the breakup." Don't fall into this trap - the best way to win out over an ex is to live a good life and be proud of who you are.
