If you never want to feel hurt or heartbroken ever again, simply do these suggestions:
1. Never be vulnerable
Do not tell someone how you really feel about them - they might not feel the same way. Never say "I love you" first or make a move. Don't let people see your weaknesses and never slip a tear.
2. Don't share your opinion
When asked how you feel about something, do not answer how you really feel. If there is a controversial topic, stay away. Avoid any blogging, commenting, or chatting about politics.
3. Avoid getting too close to anyone
If you feel those little flutters in your heart - run away! Don't spend too much time with any one person and never let them see who you really are.
4. Never try-out or run for anything
High school soccer team, city council representative, club president - nope, don't even try. You probably shouldn't apply for any jobs either.
5. Build walls around your heart
Constantly tell yourself that you're okay on your own, that you don't need anyone else, and that you're independent and proud of it.
6. Don't hope for anything from anyone
Remind yourself that people will only disappoint you, so don't place hope in them. Never hope that someone will remember what you want for your birthday, or that they'll invite you to their party or notice your new shirt. And don't expect that one guy to call you back, he probably won't.
7. Never confide in someone else
Keep all of your thoughts, feelings, and hopes buried deep inside. Never let them slip out. Keep adding more and more layers to the ever-growing wall protecting your inner-most secrets.
8. Stay in your house
Only leave when you absolutely have to. Sit on the couch and watch Netflix and experience life through your favorite characters.
9. Don't dream
Prince Charming. Malibu Barbie. Happily ever after. Success. Fame. Prosperity. Nope, don't even think about it.
But wait, I should probably mention that although you will never get hurt if you do these things, there are also a few minor side-effects:
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You will never fall in love
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You will never connect with someone
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You won't have best friends
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You will never be on the team or in the position that you want
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You will be alone
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You won't be happy
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All of your thoughts, feelings, frustrations, and fears will stay trapped inside of you
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You'll never accomplish your inner-most desires
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You'll never live
Like I said - minor side-effects.
So, is it worth it? Are these side effects worth the pain, loss, and heartache?
You can decide for yourself.
For me, it is. It's worth it.
Why?
You grow when you hurt, and you more fully appreciate the good. Without the potential for pain, the triumph wouldn't be so great. As they say, "No pain, no gain."
I really hate feeling heartache. I do not enjoy being disappointed or frustrated. But I wouldn't trade the pain for the tender moments of pure surrender, connection, and happiness. Like that moment when someone says "I love you" back. And you know that they mean it because you look into their eyes and connect with their soul.
Or the moment you've just shared everything with your best friend, and they hug you and cry with you. Or the moment after the phone call, telling you that you got the job. You stand there in pure relief and victory, holding back the tears.
The price we pay for these moments is the potential for pain.
With vulnerability, honesty, and risk there's a good chance that I'll get hurt, probably really hurt, but I believe that the side effects are worth it. Falling in love. Fulfilling my dreams. Becoming who I want to be. I'll take the chances.
Will you?