If someone ever insulted your wife, you would probably be quick to react. You would defend her and have her back, remove her from the situation, or challenge the person being disrespectful towards her. As a husband, you feel compelled to protect her as best as you can. You always are ready to go to war for her.

How do you, then, step up to bat when the person hurting your wife is her own inner dialogue? When it comes to self-confidence, our wives deal daily with mean and aggressive self-talk that puts themselves down. Every day when she looks in the mirror that voice starts chattering judgment, comparison, and condemnation. The magazines, movies, and TV shows your wife watches and the society she engages in only reinforces her to negatively look down upon herself, but you can’t remove every article about a “perfect woman” from the internet.

Ultimately, it is on your wife to do the hard work to really recognize her self-worth. So, while you can't completely fix your wife's self-confidence, you can do and say things that will help lift it. By showing her love, grace, and kindness you can help her overcome the issues she faces internally.

Share with her, and the world, how proud you are of her.

Your wife wants to feel cherished by you, and that means letting her know how proud you are to be her husband. Be her biggest cheerleader by supporting her in all her endeavors. Even when she fails, let her know you were proud of her for trying and encourage her to keep going. When you're out with friends and family, show her off by sharing her accomplishments and praising all her hard work. This will make her feel noticed by you and help her identify all the great things she's done already.

Use words of affirmation.

Affirmative words from you really do make a difference, especially when your wife has a creeping inner voice that tells her just the opposite. Identify what it is that your wife is struggling to feel good about. If she has body-image issues, for example, be sure to tell her daily that she is beautiful. If she thinks she's not a perfect parent, remind her of all the great things she's done for the family. Every chance you get, compliment her. Be genuine about what you say or it can make things worse. While she might not always be receptive to your comments in the way you wish she would be, she still hears them. The compliment still makes her pause and think for a moment that she is better. Planting the seeds in her mind can lead to bigger changes later.

Recognize that her feelings are valid to her.

Your view of your wife is drastically different than the view she has of herself. It can be difficult to understand why your wife thinks poorly of herself when you see her as a beautiful, strong, kind woman. Unfortunately for them, they have a distorted lens covering up the good qualities about themselves. Don't get frustrated or dismiss her when she says something negative about herself. Instead, accept that what she thinks is valid and real for her. If you do dismiss her comment, then she might stop sharing with you altogether. Instead by accepting her feelings, you will have more patience in helping her overcome them and be able to offer better support.

Pay attention to what you say.

When someone has low-esteem, they are more fragile and sensitive to what others say. You might make a joke with your wife that is perfectly harmless, but to her, it comes off negative. Be hypervigilant in thinking about what you say before it comes out of your mouth so that nothing negative can be derived from it. Don't be afraid to also ask your wife if there was anything you have said that may have offended her. This is a way to learn how to change your behavior to better help her feelings.

Tell your wife what she's done to help you.

Take a moment and think of all the things your wife has said or done that has helped boost your self-confidence. Maybe your wife said you looked great with your new haircut and it meant a lot to you. Whatever it is, make sure your wife knows how much you appreciated it. This will make her feel like she's done something good for another, and hopefully will let her notice how kind of a heart she really has.

Ask for her opinion and guidance.

Do you include your wife when making decisions both big and small? Make sure that you often ask for your wife's help. Your wife is your partner and equal in life, so don't let her forget that. Show her that her voice matters in your marriage and give her the confidence to discuss life plans with you, even if it's just deciding what you are having for dinner.

Reinforce the truth.

The inner voice your wife has is well ingrained and has been solidified over the years. At the core, the voice is a deceiver. When your wife says something negative about herself, it's OK to challenge it and guide her towards the truth. For example, the voice may lie and tell your wife she's a horrible mother because she struggles with depression. While the truth is that she has mental health problems, it's also true that your wife loves your family deeply and they love her back. When you stand up for the truth it helps to silence the lies. She might lash out with what you have to say, but it's important to help gracefully guide her to new thinking.

Every woman you know in your life struggles with some form of self-confidence issues, even your wife. You won't be able to change her thinking overnight, but with these tips, you'll help make a difference. Continue to show her how much you love everything about her so that she can start fighting this battle head-on.