No one generally gets married with the plan to get divorced sometime down the road. We think that it will last forever based on how in love we feel at the time. However, marriages don't last by accident. There are several factors that may decide whether your marriage will be forever.
You're each other's best friend
When something funny happens at work, is he the first person you want to tell? Are you most excited to spend the weekend with her? Good marriages are built on friendships. Your spouse should be the most important and closest person to you. She should be the one you tell your secrets to, and he should be the person you can trust the most. Successful marriages happen best when husband and wife don't just love each other, but alsolike each other.
You're on the same team
Marriage is a lot about teamwork. Husband and wife need to work together to help the marriage run smoothly. It's not about dividing up household jobs, taking care of the kids and earning an income fifty-fifty. It's about sharing the load to the best of your ability and giving one hundred percent. Working together like teammates means there's give and take. Both partners step up to the plate to get whatever needs to be done accomplished.
Your spouse's happiness is most important to you
This works best when it's a two-way street. When both husband and wife are eagerly working to make their spouse happy, this is a win-win situation. Not only does selfishness dissolve, but both partners are more than likely happy. When you and your spouse are happy, your marriage is also happy.
A rough patch doesn't mean the end of your marriage
All couples have struggles from time to time. Whether it's a disagreement, financial problems, health issues or a more serious problem, the strongest couples are able to work through it together. Even if there's a bump in the marital road, couples with lasting marriages recognize it's not the end of the relationship. The best part about rough patches is that after you work through it together, your relationship is more solid than before.
Marriages last because both partners want it to
Lasting marriages don't just happen; they take work. If you're willing to work through problems with love and communication, you're on the right path. It's OK to take a day to calm down if necessary, but issues don't go away if you ignore them. For more complex problems, marriage counseling may help.
Take time to be in love with each other. Go on date nights frequently. Date nights are homework for your marriage! They help you stay in love and continue to get to know each other. Remember why you fell in love in the first place. Keep your relationship and romance alive and active. Complacency is not a safe place to reside in such a crucial relationship.
Marriages that last require two people who love each other enough to not give up even if it gets hard. It takes love, communication, selflessness, dedication and being willing to see things through your spouse's eyes. If you don't think your marriage has what it takes right now, work with your spouse to get it in a healthier condition. It can be done, and it is totally worth it.
