It is no secret to any expectant father that pregnant women require a little more TLC. Creating life isn't easy, and at times not fun. From morning sickness to backaches, and the overall feeling of yuckiness, it's no wonder pregnant women get "reputations." I was sick for the first 28 weeks. The doctor stopped giving me Zofran at 19 weeks, and I gained 52 lbs. The blessing of bringing life into this world is one greater than anyone can imagine, which is why when asked why women keep doing it when it's miserable we simply answer, "Because it's worth it." However, there are some things that husbands can do to make those special nine months a little easier on your beautiful, selfless wives.
1. Chocolate
As almost any "hormonal" woman will tell you, having lots of chocolate on hand can be the difference between a peaceful evening and something resulting in jail time. While I've never been a big chocolate lover, when I was pregnant with my daughter, there were times when all I wanted was some M&Ms and a mint. The point is, gentlemen, if you want to keep your pregnant wife happy always have some kind of chocolate ready. It doesn't matter what form, chocolate milk, candy-bar, ice cream, whatever. As long as it has some chocolate in it, we're going to want some.
2. Cravings
Be prepared to handle cravings. Pregnant women have been known to reach for pickles, more chocolate, cucumbers, mustard (just mustard) and even dirt. The point is, be ready to run to the store to get something for your pregnant wife that you don't have, then have her wanting something completely different by the time you return. There is something about being pregnant and those pregnancy hormones make us want things that have previously disgusted us and make us disgusted at things that we've previously loved. There is no rhyme or reason for it. We can't explain why we want marshmallows and peanut butter, so please be patient.
3. Doctor appointments
I had the luxury of having my husband with me at nearly every check-up. If you've had trouble getting pregnant in the past, or even lost pregnancies, you can understand how nice it is to have your significant other there for you. There are also plenty of "firsts" that would be missed if he wasn't there. Things like, listening to the heart beat for the first time, seeing your child move for the first time or the first ultra-sound. The cliché that the whole process is miraculous is absolutely true, and most fathers are going to want to be present for all of the "firsts," and to support their wives.
4. Foot rubs
I don't make any bones about how much weight I gained when I was pregnant. It isn't something of which I'm proud, but it's going to happen. I was also pregnant during the hottest months of the year. My once, skinny little toes swelled up to the point that they resembled short bratwurst sausages. One of the best things my husband could do to keep me happy during those incredibly hot days was inviting me to lay down for a foot rub. It isn't just the heat and swelling that make pregnant feet hurt it's the 50-60 extra pounds on those puppies that weren't there before. If you want to keep your pregnant wife happy give her foot massages, preferably without her asking.
5. Tell the expectant mother she's beautiful
Regardless of what Hollywood shows us, pregnancy is not glamorous, it is not all happy nursery shopping and baby showers. Our hormones are changing, and our bodies don't work the way they once did. Some of us will go from having perfectly clear skin to being acne-ridden for the next nine months, while some of us will be so sick we literally can't do anything until after the baby is born. Even for those pregnant women who are inherently low-maintenance, we still need to hear that our significant others think we're beautiful. It wouldn't be out of the ordinary for my husband to come home from work and see me just sitting on the couch crying for no apparent reason. Having this reassurance makes everything a lot easier to handle.
Overall, just be patient, understanding, and loving. Creating life is hard work, and your wife is literally giving herself, her whole self, to bring your child into this world. Love her, be tender with her feelings, and by all means, spoil her.
