Disagreeing is a part of life and it is actually one of my favorite parts. How boring would life be if everyone just agreed all of the time? We are meant to disagree because we are all unique with different backgrounds, different lives and different views of the world. Disagreeing with others is actually a great way to broaden your horizons and see what else the world has to offer.
Unfortunately, respectful disagreements often times turn into full-blown fights. So, for those occasions when disagreements and discussions go rogue, do not despair. Instead, follow these three steps to end it the right way every time:
First: Talk it out
Pause for a moment, take a step back from the conversation, breath deep and talk it out. It may not be easy to do so at first, but the first calm words are the most difficult to say. No one wants to be the first to "give in" and admit they are wrong, so the argument continues on. When you take a minute to talk about what started the fight and evaluate whether or not it really matters; you will find that 99 percent of the time, it can be solved pretty easily with a simple compromise.
Second: Let it go
Just talking it out isn't enough, you also have to let go of whatever you were holding onto that caused contention. If he can't stand the smell of your nail polish, then simply paint your nails elsewhere. That is a simplified argument and solution, but you get the idea. Whatever it is you think you can't let go of, you can. God doesn't forgive selectively, so neither can we. Make the conscious decision to let go of petty problems and the burden of contention will be lifted. Plus, if you let it go, it will be nearly impossible for him to keep hanging on as well.
Third: Laugh it away
Laughter is truly the greatest gift of life, so let go of contention and look for the humor in every situation. Most fights stem from misunderstandings and misinterpretations that are hilarious when you stop and think about it. When you take that step back and appraise the situation, look for the humor. If you feel the situation is too tense for laughter, then find humor in the other aspects of life. Maybe a co-worker or a child did something funny; you can share that with your husband and laugh together. Laughter lightens any mood almost instantly and you two will both walk away smiling.
The steps to ending a fight perfectly and without any bitter feelings can be as simple as they sound. It will take practice to make these three steps a habit in your life, but it is worth it to create the time to master them. Take a step back, talk about it, let it go and then laugh it away; it will work every single time.
